i wish to find happiness again, even for just a brief, fleeting moment, that I may smile again, though the feeling may be surreal, i know i would prefer that over this miserable existence that has come to overwhelm me, following me, taunting me, as if all my purpose is to be its plaything, i wish to be rid of this dreadful life and change this horrid painting into a rapturous picture, if only for a time, then said time can end, and i'd be happy, if only for a brief moment, again